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Observations of a Young Nigerian Female . Powered by Blogger.

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I am young, "normal" and I like to write. People say I eat too much, people don't know what they are saying.

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How Not to Be Your Own Village People

Every day that I’m alive, there are so many reasons why I shouldn’t go after my dreams. So many. I’m sure it’s the same for you. There’s always something, but those things sometimes are just things. Sometimes, you are the problem. You are the reason you’re not doing so great, you are your nemesis, your villain, your ruination, your village people.

A lot of times, what you need to do to change your life is sit down for a minute and think, “is it at all possible that I am the problem?” think about it for real, make a list of your problems, and you may be surprised at what you find. This activity could be the difference between mediocrity and success for someone.

Now, I’m pretty sure that you’ve been thinking while reading this, “of course I’m not the problem, there are a lot of issues!” Right. Issues. We’ll talk about issues. Here are some things you can do to avoid being your own problem. Even if you don’t believe me, read it and see for yourself.

Stop focusing on the “issues”

Of course, there are issues. Everyone has them. If you asked me, I could give you a list of them. I have a rambunctious 11-month-old, and just that could take up a dozen pages.

I always tell people, “true, there are issues, but before you complain about them, make sure that you have done everything that you can do.” For me, this is not just advice, this is a principle that I live by. When I find myself complaining a lot about something or giving up, I always check to see if I have truly done everything that I can do about the situation.

Have I prayed?

Have I talked to someone knowledgeable about it?

Have I studied it?

Have I asked someone else?

Have I tried it another way?

Have I given it 100% of my energy?

Sometimes, it’s even as simple as “have I googled it?”

Think about it. Have you honestly done everything you can do about the situation or are you focused on all the reasons you can’t do it? Do everything you can first. Do it all then if it doesn’t work, you know that there is truly nothing more you can do.

Stop talking all the time about the reasons it won’t work. I’m super careful of this when I talk with my accountability buddy. If I ever catch myself saying “here’s why it won’t work…” I take it back and say “but then again I haven’t…so let me do that first.”

A good example is when I’m talking about a new business idea that I have. When I start to say, “I don’t have the money for it though” I stop and instead say, “well, let me make the plans first so when the money comes I’m ready.”

This helps me to put things in perspective. It makes problems look a lot smaller and makes things a lot more doable. It just makes it easier to hit goals, because there will never be an end to the reasons why you can’t do stuff. Do what you can do now first. That’s a good way to not be your own village people.

Make a real plan

So, you know you want to do it, but do you actually know how you’re going to do it?

You have this big thing you need to do and you’ve been going back and forth on how you’re going to do it and just saying “it’s too much”, I don’t even know where I’m going to start from. So how about you make it clear?

If you don’t know where you are going to start from, odds are you’ll never start, and a great way to fix not knowing where to start, is to find out where to start.

It’s simple. Pick up a pen and a notepad and try to map out what you need to do to get this thing done. Some things are too big to figure out in your head, you have to write it down. When you start writing out a plan, the first step is going to become pretty obvious.

But if you want, you can keep saying “I don’t even know where to start”, you’re the Patience Ozokwor of your own life.

Actually do something

Ok, stop rolling your eyes. These things are not cliché. You know you’re not doing anything. You’re thinking about it, you’re talking about it, you’re saving IG reels about it, but are you doing anything about it? Are you making any actual moves?

There’s something we humans do that I like to call “I’m working on it”, which is actually the exact opposite of working on it.

Stop it already.

Make like Nike and just do something already. Pay for the course. Make that first video. A lot of things are hard, and a lot of things are terrible the first time, but if you never start, it’s never going to be good.

There’s really not a lot to say here, just go and do what needs to be done, because there’s nobody blowing you powder. It’s all you.


I started typing this blog post because I’ve recently come across a lot of people who are constantly complaining about how their lives are not going as they want it to but are doing nothing about it. This isn’t new, really, I’ve known people like this all my life, at literally every stage. I’ve met the failing student who would cry about her grades but would not show up for tutorial sessions. I’ve met the woman looking for work and getting depressed about not being able to support her family but wouldn’t improve her CV by taking a course.

“Country hard” but you too should put in the work. Typing God when and asking a dozen people to pray for you is not an action plan.

Be very honest with yourself right now. Are you the problem?


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  1. I'm the problem. I loved the read, thank you

  2. Insightful piece! Honestly, sometimes when we do look at things, we can see where we contribute to the sad happenings. Thank you for sharing, Annie!❤️

  3. I can't believe you had to bring Patience Ozokwor into this. I stopped to comment, i am going back to the piece now

    1. Sorry 😂 I hope you enjoyed the rest of it.

  4. A great percentage of the time, we're the cause of our own fall but honesty is a hard pill to swallow. I learnt I can easily figure out a solution if I don't leave concerns in the thinking stage. Thanks for sharing, Anita.


I am a young, Nigerian female who does not possess the abilities and genetic disposition to reserve her comments.

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